A month of Thanksgiving (all at once!)

I found out about an event called "Thanksq" on Facebook.  It stood for Thanks squared  and you were supposed to use your Instagram or Retrocam on your phone and post a picture about what you were thankful for during the month of November.  I have been excited to use the new app on my phone so it was a lot of fun!  Here they are in no particular order or degree of thankfulness!

Thankful for trees that look like they are on fire

I'm thankful for my job.  I'm amazed and humbled everyday by these kids who have made me believe in miracles. 

Thankful for beautiful moon rises

Thankful for my girl who is growing up and expressing herself

Thankful for a little girl who saves the last piece of candy for her daddy

Thankful for awesome people in my life like my hair dresser who "cuts" Cadence's hair every time we are there, just because Cadence asks!

Thankful for darling daughters daintily drinking tea

Thankful for dry, warm boots that are cute to boot

Thankful for children who delight in the small things (like winding the vacuum cord)

Thankful for my first moderately successful attempt at fondant

Thankful for spontaneous and rare alone time with my girl

Thankful for an amazing speech therapist who does whatever it takes to bring words to my girl

Thankful for early sunsets, longs shadows, and games of shadow tag til you're breathless

Thankful for birthday celebrations and Chandler's cake

Thankful for 3 of the biggest blessing in my life.  I'm one very lucky mama!

Thankful to see maternal instinct in this girl who had no mama for the first 16 months of her life

Thankful for little girls who still want to be little (despite idolizing their big sister)

Thankful for trips down memory lane

Thankful for my husband who works tirelessly for our family but can still be a kid at heart

Thankful for big holes that will create lots of fun & memories for years to come

Thankful for LAF. It's her initials... and it's what I do all of the time I'm with her!

Portraits

As I said, I have some catching up to do!  These were portraits that were done October 2010!  My good friend Megan, of Oldfields Photograpy  , took photos of the girls and a couple family shots. We haven't had professional family photos in years and I really wanted some good pictures before Cadence had her surgery.  Megan, of course, delivered!

We bought these dresses in China in preparation for Chinese New Year Celebrations.

Why is it impossible for me to get such good smiles out of them?!

Don't let the smiles fool you ... there was plenty of "stern" talking during this family shot!

Megan proposed that we let them jump on the bed.  Of course the girls loved it, although I kept thinking "This is the shot where we will say '... and right after this Cadence had her arm dislocated'!"

Luckily that didn't happen, but the girls had a blast and tons of fun smiles!

I adore this one of my "big girls"

This is Cadence's wrestling stance... she's gonna take you doooowwwwn!

I love her face now, but I loved this smile first! (and miss it a little)

Laurel turns 7!

My sweet girl turned 7 years old this month!  "Sweet" really sums her up... it always has.  She has a sweet little face and sweet little voice.  Most of all, her heart is sweet.  She will refuse to eat the last piece of candy if she knows that someone hasn't gotten a bite.  She is continuously worried about the homeless and wants to give them all of her money.  If she sees that someone is upset she tries to help them or at least hug them.  She is just a sweetheart!

Laurel has also matured a lot this past year.  She really seems much more grown up.  She loves to read (like her big sis!) and is excelling in school.  She has her own mind and seems to make almost of her choices without indecision or regret.  I pray that she will carry all of these traits with her throughout her life.

Laurel decided to get her ears pierced for her birthday.  She recently watched Sierra gets her ears repierced and it was done one at a time.  Laurel was insistent (and there was no changing her mind!) that she wanted it done the same way.  As I had anticipated, with the pinch of the first ear she cried and cried.  Poor girl.  After a few minutes though, she determinedly said she wanted the second one done!  She looks so cute and is happy that she did it.

She decided to have a gymnastics birthday party and all of the kids had a ball!  I had my first attempt at making fondant decorations.  It took a few batches and many hours, but it turned out cute!  Laurel also decided to make donations to UVA Children's Hospital in lieu of birthday gifts for herself.  The families were so generous and we'll be dropping off 4 big bags of games, toys, and books to the hospital.  Besides asking for a cell phone, TV, DVD player, dog, horse, and car (really?!) for her birthday, the number one item on her list was an American Girl doll.  The grandparents came through for her and she is a happy girl! 

Before getting her ears pierced.  The after was too sad to show.

She loves Elizabeth

Hamming it up at her party

Even Cadence got to take part!

This was called "Rocket Ship"... I REALLY wanted to do it!

Sierra caught some air

Another favorite, the foam pit

And the parachute

Celebration #3 with our good friend Kelli who shares a birthday with Laurel!

Happy Birthday, Laurel

Karate and attachment

Cadence has started taking Little Dragons at our local karate dojo.  I've been looking forward to this because:

#1. Sierra and Laurel went there for 4 years and stopped this past December.  I've been looking forward to seeing everyone again.
#2. Cadence can use a space to run around and she excels in being loud.
#3. I was curious to see if anyone else could sway Cadence into doing what she is supposed to do, particularly when she has decided that she doesn't want to do it..

We accomplished #1 and half of #2.  She loves the running around but she quickly clams up in unfamiliar situations.  Despite going once a week since August she is still fairly quiet in class.  As for #3, well the answer is a big, fat N-O!  I spend the first two months out on the floor doing most of the activities with Cadence.  She refused to let go of my hand if I encouraged her to do something by herself.  One day, as the kids were walking in to class, I was engrossed in conversation with another mom.  Shihan (the instructor of the school) took Cadence by the hand, led her into class, and she did the whole class without me - as long as she didn't visualize me!  We did this routine for a few weeks and it seemed she was starting to get the hang of it.  I have been dying to watch her in class so last week we had a little talk before class.  I asked if she wanted me in the room to watch her.  She said yes.  I said that I would stay and watch her if she did the class without holding my hand.  She said yes.  I have no idea why I thought that this conversation with a 2 year old would actually hold any ground in real life!

We got to class and she refused to do anything unless I was on the floor with her.  When they were getting in line to run laps she got up by herself and started participating.  After a couple of laps she figured out that I wasn't  going to run with her and the tears started.  The instructors ran with her and told encouraged me to leave and see how she would do.  She howled cried.  And cried.  And cried.  I kept hoping if I waited just one more moment she would stop screaming settle down and decide to take part in class.  She most definitely did not!  I finally went back in and we bailed decided to head home early!

Later that evening I saw a fellow adoptive mom (ironically the same person who bought our old house and they have 2 adopted children).  Her daughter also does Little Dragons and she has seen Cadence's resistance to take part in class without me.  She didn't see the performance that day, but I told her about it.  She gave me her take on the situation, the thing that she loves to see.  She sees that Cadence wants me and only me.  She wants me because she knows that I am her mom and I will take care of her and be there for her when she needs me.  She wants me because she is attached to me.  And as an adoptive parent, that is huge!  I remember when Sierra was a baby and we were letting her "cry it out".  My heart ached and I felt terribly guilty and worried that she was thinking that we had "abandoned" her.  But I never doubted that when I walked into her room and got her out of bed that she would feel safe and secure in my arms.  It never crossed my mind that Sierra or Laurel wouldn't think of me as their Mommy.  This isn't the case when you adopt a child. 

When I worry that Cadence might feel like I am abandoning her, I am truly worried that she thinks I am Abandoning her.  Why would she not think that?  Twice in her life, she has been left.  Her biological mother left her in a  hospital.  The orphanage workers, the people she knew as her caregivers, left her in my arms.  While I hope to think that one day she will view that latter as a blessing,  I cannot overlook the fact that she knows that the people who have taken care of her have "upped and left" her.  So why,  when I walk out of the dojo and leave her in a room full of strangers, why would she not think that I am never coming back?

That is why it's so good and so reassuring to hear that another adoptive mom, another woman who has felt these same concerns,  sees what she does.  She sees attachment.  And with attachment, and time,  Cadence will know, to her very core, that when we are apart, I will always come back.  She will truly know that I am her Mommy.

Catching up...

I often want to blog something but think "It happened too long ago, it's silly to write about it now" or "I've posted too many pictures".  And then I remember, hey, it's my blog!  I can do whatever I want with it!  One of the things I've enjoyed most about blogging is looking back at my own personal online journal and photo album.  This summer was busy and crazy fast and there were a lot of fun memories that I didn't get to blog about but want to have them right here in this space... so I'm catching up.  While I keep warm by the fire I can look longingly at the pictures of my kiddos in bathing suits by the pool.  I'm sure this winter will fly by as fast as the summer and we'll be back there before we know it!

We enjoyed many cookouts and firepits with our good friends.  We tried to squeeze in a few extras before one of the moved away.  This particular day in early summer we celebrated out favorite triplets' birthdays.

Can you feel the enthusiasm?!

Maddie loves her some Cadence

Group hug!

Such a cute girl

And a handsome boy!

Crazy kids

The water balloons eventually came out... and give Macie an idea

How much do those diapers really hold?

Ooohhh... THAT much!

Enthusiasm, right?!

Compiling their stock of water balloons

Finally cake time!

Happy birthday Sophie, Maddie, and Will

Halloween 2011

Our first time trick-or-treating out "in the country"!  There is a neighborhood right across the street, but the homes are on large lots (2-5 acres).  Luckily, we have a great neighbor who takes all of the kids out on the back of his tractor!  The kids had a ball going house to house this "new" way and despite hitting fewer homes than at the Lake, they came home with quite the stash!

Zombies and a few cute ones!

Hay ride

Cadence got more candy than she could handle (I was nice enough to help her out!)

The Meade's sent a fun Halloween package!

Mustaches and fake eyeballs

Gee, can you guess which direction this will go?

She wasn't a fan, but she was a good sport!

My first!

I refinished my first piece of furniture!  I've had this table since 1998.  It has usually been an entry way table and I decided it was time for a change.  It had a little to do with the white walls of our new house bearing down on me.  I needed color - somewhere, anywhere, everywhere!  How about on the table?  I found a beautiful Robin's Egg Blue that went well with the new rug (love!) for my front door. I didn't tell forgot to tell Brad that I wasn't painting it black as I had originally planned. 

We carted it to the basement and I filled in the scratches and holes with wood filler then sanded the whole table down.  As I wiped away the dust I had an "Oh sh#t!" moment when I saw the scratched up finish.  What the heck was I thinking ruining a perfectly good table?  I had never refinished anything before.  What if it turned out terrible?!  By that time though, I had to do something else with it.  Over the next few weeks days I primed it, painted it, and held my breath as I called Brad down to check it out.  I got the reaction I anticipated.  "It's blue.  Really blue.  It's not going to work up there."  I had been throwing around the idea of putting an aging glaze on it so I figured I'd try that to tone it down a bit.  After finally finding what I wanted I put a very light coat of glaze on it, a coat of poly, put on the new knobs I picked out, and voila!

I carried it upstairs myself so that I could admire it without naysayers Brad in the background.  And I love it!  Guess what?  Brad said he actually likes it too!  I am picking up a new dresser on Thursday to refurnish for Sierra's room.

My only before picture (after wood filler)

My "Oh sh#t" moment!

The blue isn't exact in this picture, but it is bright

After!

In case you've never seen this really cool thing, it's paintable wallpaper.  I wanted to paint our computer room a deeper, darker color, but not the entire room.   Since there isn't a chair rail, this was a great way to break it up.  I had seen this in a home a very long time ago and have been waiting for the chance to do it.  Love it too!  Just need to get some pictures up on the walls.