Cadence has got her groove back! Two weeks post-op for her cleft lip repair and she is her usual ornery, happy, silly little self! Albeit with a much smaller smile, but it's beautiful and we are happy to be done with surgeries for a few years. Honestly, I had a really difficult time with the whole transition. She just didn't look like herself. Everyone kept saying how great her lip looked and what a good job the surgeon had done... logically I knew this to be true. But where was the little girl that I met in China just 4 months ago? Understandably her personality was a little "off" too. She was uncomfortable, her lip hurt, and I'm sure she was wondering "What happened to my mouth and why does it feel funny?". I think this, along with the physical change, just shook me up a little and made it feel like we were meeting all over again. In the midst of my feelings of guilt about the way I was processing it all I talked to another mom whose son had surgery for his cleft lip after he got home from China. I was so relieved to know that I wasn't alone or a terrible mom for having to adjust to the newness. I am so happy to have Cadence back to her usual self and smiling her "new" beautiful smile!Sunday, January 23, 2011
Two weeks post-op
Cadence has got her groove back! Two weeks post-op for her cleft lip repair and she is her usual ornery, happy, silly little self! Albeit with a much smaller smile, but it's beautiful and we are happy to be done with surgeries for a few years. Honestly, I had a really difficult time with the whole transition. She just didn't look like herself. Everyone kept saying how great her lip looked and what a good job the surgeon had done... logically I knew this to be true. But where was the little girl that I met in China just 4 months ago? Understandably her personality was a little "off" too. She was uncomfortable, her lip hurt, and I'm sure she was wondering "What happened to my mouth and why does it feel funny?". I think this, along with the physical change, just shook me up a little and made it feel like we were meeting all over again. In the midst of my feelings of guilt about the way I was processing it all I talked to another mom whose son had surgery for his cleft lip after he got home from China. I was so relieved to know that I wasn't alone or a terrible mom for having to adjust to the newness. I am so happy to have Cadence back to her usual self and smiling her "new" beautiful smile!
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you are definitely not the only mom to feel this way...i remember feeling funny at times when i'd look at mali, wondering who she was. silly, i know. but with the drastic change in appearance, and of course personality since she didn't feel so great post-op, it threw me for a loop too. i am actually to the point now where, yes, there are times when i still miss mali's first smile that i fell in love with, but most other times i almost can't remember what she looked like back then too. it's a weird combination. suffice it to say, i don't think there's anything "wrong" or "weird" with how you've felt. oh, and by the way, i love the new look of your blog page!
ReplyDeleteCadence is precious! Glad to see she made a quick recovery!
ReplyDeleteTheresa, that is exactly what I have thought when I looked at her - "Who are you?". Good to know I'm not the only one! Thanks!
ReplyDeleteYour honesty and transparency are part of what make you a great mom for Cadence! She will never have to worry that you will sugar coat her truths, but that you will be open with her, help her thru the rough patches, and still love her like crazy! See you all soon!
ReplyDeleteHugs to you! Cadence will always be the beautiful girl you gave your heart to.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you from Canada,
Darcy
Cadence looks great and I understand what you mean about getting used to it. You grew to over her exactly as she was and now she looks a little different. She is beautiful and that shines through. I hope it is okay but I shared a little bit about your story with my Mom's group today..some of them might pop over here for a visit.
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