The day of her birth...

Today is Cadence's 2nd birthday!  We've already celebrated it twice and have another one planned for today.  She's gotten lots of presents, tons of kisses, too much cake, and hundreds of pictures taken to document this event.   I can't imagine our home without her laugh, her antics, and her silliness!  I am so thankful that we get to celebrate this time with her and that she is in our life. 

Honestly, though, I have some guilt about our thankfulness.  Because for all of our happiness and joy, someone else has heartbreak and suffering.  Regardless of "why" her birthmother abandoned her, I can't imagine it was done lightly or without tears.

It's 1:19pm in China right now.  Is she counting down the hours and minutes of the day to note exactly when Cadence entered the world, like I do with Sierra and Laurel?  Has she shed any tears for the little girl that she will never see grow up?  Does she imagine Cadence alone in an orphanage crib or have brighter visions of her in some mother's arms?  Does she have another child in her arms right now?

Not only do I think about Cadence's first mother, I think about the heartbreak that Cadence will endure one day.  One day, when she can understand her story.  We can give her the sun, moon, and stars, but it will never take away the fact that someone gave her up. It may not be until she holds her own child in her arms and feels what maternal love is, but it will come one day.  I pray often that she will understand, forgive, and be at peace with it.  I hope that the love we give her will be enough to make up for the love that she didn't get.